City of Legends

The TVC2008 has a winner!

It is SevenLamps, for their video version of DARFUR (Jesus Wept).

To see the video, please go here

SevenLamps gets a $100 cash prize and a bookshelf of my CDs and books worth more than an additional $100.00!  Yay!  And they get bragging rights!

The runner up does not go away empty handed…Minnever’s rendition of from out of the city gets her a free book and CD combo and a place of honor with us.

We will be announcing the details of the TVC2009 (yes, we’re doing it again) next week.

Oh…and, Happy Birthday to me.  Happy Birthday to me…

According to various sources, including myself, my web hosting company (web.com), my publisher, my friend Dan McTaggart, the remaining judges for the TVC2008 who have not yet gotten their votes in to me (harrumph), Barnes & Noble, my parents, my sibs, the media, my sons, one of my ex wives and two or three inspirationally-gifted friends, the next three days of my life should unfold with some of the following milestones.

Tomorrow we will announce the winner of the TVC2008. Mass hysteria will abound as we announce the TVC2009.

peacat.com will vanish, by midnight tonight. If no one with greater claim to the name asks for it before the registration runs out next year, it will go back on the open market.

I will give three two-hour readings at Barnes & Noble in Morgantown, WV, Sunday (10-12, 1-3, 4-6) with the assistance of the amazing Dan McTaggart, who co-authored Psalms of the Monster River Cult with me. I don’t think they could handle the intensity of the Long Beach reads, so I am trying to strike a balance.

Michael Phelps will win two more Olympic Gold Medals.

I will add ten more pieces to williamfdevault.com. Someone will blast me for the lovely nudity that is interspersed with the other artwork on the site. I will feel bad that I am being criticized, but will soldier on.

I will hear from someone out of an unexpected quarter.

I will write something inexplicably charming.

I will announce sometime today…oops, already did, that some of the Fields of Arbol pieces appearing on Amomancer will find their way onto williamfdevault.com.

Some doucebag will leave a stupid (definition: willfully ignorant), presumptive and irrelevant comment on one of my blogs.

I will drive over 500 miles in the next three days. I will still be alive Monday morning.

I will have dinner with my family on Saturday, and visit with my Grandmother, who is 96…bearing down on 97 next month.

I will discover a fantastic new muse.

It has been a long three months, all I am asking for is five more days before we announce the winner of the TVC2008 poetry video contest. I have a judging panel in place, they are at work, and I will announce the winner of the $100 cash and over $100 worth of my books and CDs early Saturday morning.

I’m just glad it isn’t my choice.

Next year we’ll get the contest started sooner, make sure I am not in the middle of a romantic meltdown at the kickoff and increase the prize(s).

Oh, and I have decided that no one walks empty handed.

Also, I am considering contests to design a new logo for this site and perhaps even Amomancer and williamfdevault.com. Maybe three separate logos/banners, or perhaps one unify one. Hmmmmmm.

First, a quick catch-up bit: TVC2008, the winner will still be announced on August 16. I will still be doing a six hour reading and book signing at the Barnes & Noble in Morgantown, WV, on August 17th. Dan McTaggart is scheduled to be there for part of the day. The new CD, Evangelist, is out, we’re just slow with the distribution channels, give us a day or two. williamfdevault.com is coming along slowly, but beautifully. I am feeling better…knowing is always better than the dread of ignorance.

Now to the show.

I have been having a lot of fun, and it has been great therapy for me, catching sparks from some of the art and photographs on deviantart.com (it’s not what you think, zhlub). A special part of that has been the revival of my Fields of Arbol, over on the Amomancer blog and the willingness, even the palpable excitement of some photographers, artists and models to have their works displayed alongside the poems presented and inspired by them.

Some have portfolios so extensive and expressive that I am considering adding a section to the new site that will feature galleries of just specific creatives, (hear that, Cody? Mariya? Kalea? Johanna?). We shall see if I am still alive after the 17th, shall we?

Thanks to my lovely children for the mad sanity they inject into my life, thank you to LiZa for the kindness and Annette, Elena and Karla for the emotional support.

Let’s go make some changes to the world

Pardon me while I scream, loudly.

Too many decisions. Not for the judging of the TVC2008. We only got two entries (I shoulda sprung for the grand as the first prize, but I was saving up for this vacation that never came to be…or at least hasn’t yet, you never know).

No, picking the illustrations for the reboot at williamfdevault.com. It is maddening. I have no less than a half-dozen excellent choices for eyes of stained glass and fire. Another four or five for sex cookies. You don’t want to know what is going on with the trilogy of Pink Jade poems I am including. And if this one magnificent photographer/model from Sweden whom I have been courting says yes, well let’s just say I will do a small victory dance, then curl up in a fetal position and wish to be nine years old again.

Plus, consider what looking at all this pulchritudinous, often nude or demi-nude, female flesh is doing to a guy who has been celibate since Bush’s 1st term. Hey, I spelt pulchritudinous correctly. Wow.

I do know about 15% of the assigned works to the first round of poems, as of now.

This is why I go quietly mad between assistants. There was a time…

Today my sons, Dante and Elric, turn 15. I will be taking them to see The Dark Knight on the iMax screen at the Udvar-Hazy Center of the Smithsonian. They are pumped. As a combined present to them and their sister, Peri, their mother and I flew Peri in and surprised the boys yesterday. It is fun watching teenaged boys trying to act cool when they are surprised, taking all their low-key poses.

Today is the final day for submissions to the TVC2008 video contest (see above). If you haven’t started your project, you are probably too late. Next year, more lead time and bigger prizes, I promise. This has been mishandled by me. Thanks to those who have submitted and there will be an award on August 16th.

I have been pondering the logistics of the new version of williamfdevault.com. I was thinking of making it in two stages of 50-100 poems each, but have decided that is too complicated and grandiose and boring (to me). So, starting this Wednesday, July 23, you will start seeing slow, subtle changes on that site as the new works (and some old ones) and the art and photography begin to flow like vodka and Red Bull at an all-night disco. I want to thank the dozens of artists, photographers and models who have entertained the notion. I only received two rejections, and both were heart-breaking (it is a fragile thing, patched as it is) I found some amazing people who I trust will not only contribute to this effort, but will be my friends for many years to come.

I have much to do today, and it only gathers momentum as the days and weeks fly by. So, I am off to Ka Latil to do what I am expected to do.

Ouch.  Twisted my ankle on my walk yesterday.  Which means only that if you see a darkly dressed, bearded figure limping as he walks along Fair Lakes Parkway today at lunchtime, that’s me.  I’m not slowing down.  But it hurts like hell.

Picked up a few new models and photogs overnight.  Maybe I need to do a contest like the TVC2008 (which has gotten crappy response owing to a) my cheapness in prizes and b) the short amount of time between announcement and due date, both of which have been pointed out to me by people who aren’t afraid to aggravate me).  Some excellent new photos that are taking me in new directions are now in the mix, although I have promised myself to keep the site to PG-13, despite some rather lovely nudes that have been brought forward. 

I am sorry if I seem distracted and/or inattentive…I am very busy on several projects at once and my bleed-off time is limited.  It will only get worse over the next few days.  Mid-next week I should be human again.

No, I did not get 100 links up yesterday.  Thanks for noticing.  To quote Wesley in Wanted:  What the fuck have you done lately? I may get that tattoo’d across my forehead.

I ran into the situation of how to have 100 links without unbalancing the page.  Will have to scratch my head a bit on that one.  Slept well, slept hard, have begun sleeping past 4 am (good sign).

Today:  Finish cleaning up loose ends, spend a few hours having anxiety attack over how good the Evangelist cut is going to be/not be.

Closing in on completing the tag indexing of Amomancer.  Starting from now and working back, there was an imbalance.  Starting at the back and moving forward, we are getting a more balanced picture of my catalog posted.

Someone wrote me about the use of Aubergine as a muse-tag, particularly on Amomancer.  Bite me.  This is to pave the way for the book Aubergine, which is to be the final words that began with As such…  Regrettable, but while stupid dogs stick around and bite when kicked, smart ones fold their tents and move on.  The last one out is not a quitter, they are an idealist, a romantic.  I can live with that legacy.  By the way, ahem, the apology was not for the relationship, it was for disbelieving an informed warning.  Don’t make assumptions when dealing with me.  You’ll be wrong more often than not.

And try not to read too much into the recent spate of KFS oriented poetry.  She’s a friend I was once romantically involved with, one of the most honorable and brave people I know, as well as being an excellent writer.  And, last time I checked, she had a boyfriend….who knows about us and our track record.  She has never re-invented herself, ever.  That’s class.  That’s integrity.

Anyway, I have a lot of things to do…more to do than I had on Friday…as new stuff comes in faster than I can juggle.  But that’s the way…uh huh uh huh…I like it…uh huh uh huh.

Working on a logo…and waiting for the last-minute video entries everyone is promising me…two weeks until deadline.

I was sifting through the works I have been composing over the last few weeks. There’s a lot, a lot. An interesting melange of anger and fear and lust and love and pain and joy and hope and despair and the human condition. Some fairly well writ material, I am pleased to say. We’re creeping up towards 17,000 works in the catalog now. That is almost the equivalent of having written a poem a day, every day, since I was five years old.

Can I quit now?

No.

Poetry never deserts you, lies to you, betrays you. It never says one thing but does another. Poetry speaks the truth, without regard for agenda. I think of the scene in All That Jazz when Victoria Porter is up in Joe Gideon’s apartment and she asks him if he thinks she has what it takes to be a star. He clenches his fists because he can’t lie to her about THAT, and tells her no, realizing at the same time it probably will derail his whole seduction strategy.

She rationalizes it away and sleeps with him anyway. But he was willing to not sleep with her, in order to keep his integrity in the moment.

I’ve never lied to a protege, no matter how pretty or willing, and told her she was good when I knew she wasn’t. I have been fortunate enough to be involved with some remarkable writers. People with the power to shine like the sun and roar like the thunder. That few have lived up to the potential I have seen in them is no insult to or indictment of them or me, some choose a different path. I don’t think a barber or an office worker or an ice cream salesman is less than me, just different. There are days I would gladly trade my place in this life for theirs. Gladly surrender. Trade it all for one honest kiss.

Trust me. I believe in surrender, I just can’t find anyone to surrender to. I have tried, really tried. At least a few times. But I keep hearing that "I know what I said and I know what it sounded like, but it was said in the moment and I had my fingers crossed anyway and…" speech that tells me that poetry is still my only earnest mistress and master.

I am anxious to see more of the TVC2008 entries, anxious to see more of what people see in their heads when they hear my words. I am coming to pieces trying to finish the Evangelist CD. In part, because there are a half-dozen unfinished tracks I cannot complete for various reasons, either AWOL collaborators (Kitabu) or production delays (Aubergine) or a sense of incompleteness (gotterdamerung). This may be my last CD for a while and I want it right.

I hate shutting down peacat, especially with at least two external authors in line to publish through it, but I see no moral or ethical alternative. I am trying to feel my way through a complex labyrinth, but I am making headway.

Henry Plantagenet was right. But I am not quitting. Not on poetry. Not on life. Not on love. I can’t let the disease of other peoples’ complexities hobble me, taint me and take from me that which I require to do what I am required to do.

So, buckle in, people. And get ready for some Crazy Ivan turns that will reap the whirlwind. Daddy’s home.

It was hot yesterday, and we are due for a reprise today. I jet out late this evening. I have had an interesting time, the heat…the food poisoning, these were not great…but spending so much time with Peri and getting to do some background research on some of the mindgames being played on the web, that was entertaining.

On more pleasant fronts, here is one of the first official entries in the TVC2008 contest, which caught my attention:

The soundtrack to Streets of Fire burning through my skull (last time I buy earbuds from a guy with a tail) I sit down to mention a few key pieces most likely to be included in the Evangelist tourbook…

You already know about the big three…let’s add to those

• Soubrette
• even as a little girl
• welcome to the center of the world
• in the memory of lovers (plus) I will be no pretender
• etude in infrared and ultraviolet
• Evangelist
• brisant revelations
• monument
• The Unicorns
• My Electric Lady (gets more prophetic with each passing day)
• Bragi to Freya
• confession
• the grande
• reading
• you are the shape of the hole in my soul
• ballistic trajectory
• pain to peace
• more than gods can comprehend
• the road beyond damascus
• selah
• love gods of a forgotten religion
• Darfur (Jesus wept)

It’s a start. I’m laying some tracks tonight. And we’ve worked out the merch for the trip…I will be toting a small caravan of books and CDs to those sites that do not order their own stock. Should be fun. We are also going to try and put together a montage of the best videos from the TVC2008 contest.

How are we going to do this all? Bwahahahahaha! I got a sponsor!