City of Legends

A whirlwind week, full of magic and muses and musings. Came to some conclusions, was blown by some winds, considered new options.

My friend, the Roman, has approached me with a deal to completely redesign my blog and the new site. It’s attractive, the deal, and his design ideas are excellent. I enjoyed the brief time of excessive darkness, but that time has passed, and int he absence of the webmaster who created it maintaining it, it seems common sense to change.

The reaction I am getting to the lovely artwork by my friends is terrific, and I thank you all who have been visiting here and at williamfdevault.com for your interest and comments. I have become very good friends with several of the artists (and will say no more on that topic).

There has been a time of discussion regarding my next CD and book projects. Debate has been furious and infuriating, as I am not of a mind to anchor myself to a concept when things can change so radically in a few weeks’ or months’ time. For now my goal is to name the next CD Amomancer VI and the next book The Ronin Returns. Titles subject to change.

Yes, Barbara, yes Jazz, yes, everyone…I am not planning to spend the rest of my life as a monk, but as a man. I am in love, but let me qualify that. I have never fallen out of love in my life. Is there someone new in my life? Perhaps. But having been lead to an exhibitionistic display of affection in recent months, only to find myself in quicksand (which is neither malicious or evil, merely a natural hazard to be avoided) I am not of a whim or will to start screaming my heart to the universe. For those of you who have been followers of mine from the start, consider this Venice II. You will understand if you were aware.

There is a great ennui at my door, and I battle it every day. Lacking an open champion status, I find myself drained and pained. I am fighting through, without pharmaceuticals, without drinking, without recreational sex. This does not make me better that anyone else, it merely means I am staying true to myself.

This week began with the birthday for my grandmother, who is now 97 (and feisty). Wednesday was the 35th birthday of my second wife, Ann. Thursday was 9/11. Tomorrow is the 50th birthday of my first wife, and mother of my three reasons for still hanging around for Act III, Jan. It has been an auspicious week.

A pingback brought this photo to my attention, one of a set of three of my ex-wife, Ann, from a film festival in Los Angeles in 2001. She was featured on the cover of my books from an unexpected quarter and Love Gods of a Forgotten Religion and remains one of the more remarkable people I have known in this life.

People ask me why I married her, considering the age difference and some major issues we were never able to rise completely above. This picture doesn’t tell the tale of the person I came to love and respect, but it does explain why just about everyone always asked her "What are you doing with HIM?" My answer to people who asked me that question remains "Well, she asked…"

Her work with young people via Sunrise House in Salinas and with the Calfiornia Friday Night Live Partnership with the students from high schools and middle schools in Monterey County, particularly North Salinas High School, proved her a most thoughtful, charitable and competent person.

Her totem-muse was "the Leopard" and she inspired such works as sparks like frozen lemons, monday mourning poem, sacred smile and brisant revelations, which has since turned into perhaps my most kick-ass contribution to poetic rock.

To this date, she remains the last woman I touched as lover.